Fresh Snack Reports | Contact us
Sun-Maid Raisins
OFFICIAL SNACK REPORT
Sanctioned By WASAW
Snack Committee
Reviewed By: Kid Nougat Location: Exchange Place Place, Jersey City OFFICIAL NAME OF SNACK: WEIGHT: 1 oz. DESCRIPTION OF SNACK: SNACK LOOKS LIKE: SSI RATING (SNACK SATISFACTION INDEX - 1-10): 8.3 (rhymes with "raisins for you, raisins for me") |
|
UPSIDE:
Raisins are a healthy, no-fat snack with an undeniable hipness factor. "Check out that dude eating raisins. Wow, that's kinda cool. A great idea. I haven't had raisins in a long time, and I wanna look cool like him,
so..." Chicks will think you're a down-to-earth kinda guy, especially if you top off the effect by having a copy of Thoreau's "Walden" in your back pocket. Don't wear sandals, though - that's overkill.
DOWNSIDE:
Technically, raisins are dried grapes. Dried grapes? Ewww.
1ST 4 INGREDIENTS:
Raisins (duh)
Vegetable Oil
Partially Hydrogenated Cottonseed
Soybean
LAST 4 INGREDIENTS:
Raisins (double duh)
Vegetable Oil
Partially Hydrogenated Cottonseed
Soybean
PACKAGING:
It doesn't get any better than this. You know it, you love it. Classic. I'm SO hot for the Sun-Maid Raisin Girl. She's a cross between Melissa Gilbert as Half-Pint Ingalls and Jane Seymour as Dr. Quinn, Medicine Woman. That's early-American charm, baby!
DO I RECOMMEND YOU TRY THIS YOURSELF?
Indubitably. Buy a bag and sprinkle 'em on your cereal tomorrow morning. Then thank Kid Nougat for his breakfast genius.
DIDN'T THIS SNACK HAVE SOMETHING TO DO WITH A FAMOUS PLAY?
Oh yes. "A Raisin in the Sun," written in 1958 by Lorraine Hansberry, won the New York Drama Critics Circle Award. Hansberry's drama focuses on the Youngers, a 1950's African-American working-class family in Chicago striving to realize their individual dreams of prosperity and education, and their collective dream of a better life. I don't think anyone eats raisins, though.
SUM UP YOUR EXPERIENCE IN THREE WORDS OR LESS:
Me likey raisin-girl. (Shut up - "raisin-girl" counts as one word!)
