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SkyBar

OFFICIAL SNACK REPORT
Sanctioned By WASAW Snack Committee

Reviewed By: Kid Nougat Location: Chelsea Car Wash, 15th Street & 10th Avenue, NYC OFFICIAL NAME OF SNACK: SkyBar (Necco) PRICE: $.78 WEIGHT: 1.5 oz. DESCRIPTION OF SNACK: If you thought the all-stars at Necco only made wafers, think again! Say hello to a schizophrenic snacking sandwich! I’m talkin’ ‘bout a milk chocolate candy bar with four separate and distinct flavors – caramel, vanilla, peanut and fudge! SSI RATING (SNACK SATISFACTION INDEX - 1-10):  8.9 (Sort of a nine, but not really.) UPSIDE: In a word, variety. Why buy a caramel bar, a vanilla bar, a peanut bar, and a fudge bar? Who am I, Kid Rockefeller? I’m not made of money, be-atch! I need to get all four flavors in one bar! DOWNSIDE: The bar is WAY too small. The experience is over WAY too quickly. (Please do not draw any biological parallels from this downside.)

Image stolen from Necco.com.

1ST 4 INGREDIENTS:

Milk Chocolate
Vanillin
Sugar
Corn Syrup

LAST 4 INGREDIENTS:

Sweetened Condensed Skim Milk
Butter
Salt (I like my chocolate salty, don't you?)
Egg Whites

PACKAGING:

If it was 1957, the bright yellow wrapper and blandly red “SKY BAR” would feel futuristic. Since it’s 2004, it just feels bright and bland. (Note to self: am I too critical? Am I making sense? Ease up on the Diet Coke.)

DO I RECOMMEND YOU TRY THIS YOURSELF? (YES/NO - EXPLAIN):

It’s an 8.9, Holmes! Of course I recommend it! Get your ass to the candy store!

DOES THIS CANDY BAR SHARE ITS NAME WITH A POPULAR HOLLYWOOD HANGOUT
CREATED BY SUPERMODEL CINDY CRAWFORD’S HUSBAND?

Indeed. West Hollywood’s Sky Bar – a creation of Randy Gerber – is housed in the Mondrian Hotel and boasts some trendy patrons. DiCaprio, Jewel, Sir Snackalot – the list goes on and on.

HOW CAN THE PRODUCT BE IMPROVED:

NOUGAT, that’s how! What an oversight! How could they possibly forget the nougat? Who’s responsible for this? WHO, I SAY! (I’d swap out the vanilla. I’ve already got an angry letter in the mail. I’ll keep you posted.)

AND YOU THOUGHT YOUR JOB WAS BAD:

The wrapping features a Guarantee of Satisfaction: “We have used the finest ingredients in this bar and will gladly replace it if you are not satisfied. Send us the wrapper including the unused portion of the bar, stating when and where purchased.” How’d you like to receive half-eaten candy bars in the mail, along with letters from whiny fools? Me? The Kid? I’ll stick with beet farming, thanks.

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