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Dots

OFFICIAL SNACK REPORT
Sanctioned By WASAW Snack Committee

Reviewed By: Paddy O' Poppycock

Location: CVS

OFFICIAL NAME OF SNACK:
DOTS®

PRICE: $.79 (on sale)

WEIGHT: 7 oz.

DESCRIPTION OF SNACK:
"Assorted Fruit Flavored Gumdrops."

SNACK LOOKS LIKE:

If you were an ant, they'd look like the most inviting little comfy chairs you could ever imagine.

SSI RATING (SNACK SATISFACTION INDEX - 1-10): 9.5

UPSIDE:

Oh man, they finally figured out how to make DOTS fresh and chewy! They've always been good, but now they're consistently soft. My jaw use to ache for days after eating a few, but no longer! The perfect non-chocolate snack -- and sonuvabitch, they're fat free, too!

DOWNSIDE:

I'm not an ant. (I really want to have DOT lawn furniture.)

1ST 4 INGREDIENTS:

Corn Syrup
Sugar
Modified Food Starch
Malic Acid

LAST 4 INGREDIENTS:

Malic Acid
Artificial and Natural Flavors (are there any other kinds?)
Sodium Citrate
Artificial Colors

PACKAGING:

The happiest packaging ever! Makes you want to hug the box and then immediately go find yourself a movie theater in which to properly enjoy them. New DOT DROP Dispenser makes for fun, efficient snacking. There's even a game for the kids on back.

DO I RECOMMEND YOU TRY THIS YOURSELF? (YES/NO - EXPLAIN):

YES.

WHICH SOUTH PARK CHARACTER WOULD LIKE IT BEST?:

I picture the school bus driver always having a box of Dots by the dashboard light...

HOW CAN THE PRODUCT BE IMPROVED:

Come out with a line of DOT lawn furniture with my ass sitting comfortably all over it.


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