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Barnum's Animal Crackers
OFFICIAL SNACK REPORT
Sanctioned By WASAW
Snack Committee
Reviewed By: Sir Snackalot Location: CVS OFFICIAL NAME OF SNACK: PRICE: $1.25 DESCRIPTION OF SNACK: SSI RATING (SNACK SATISFACTION INDEX - 1-10): 9.5 (an extra point for the package's string.) |
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UPSIDE:
You can play with them, you can eat them. Get your army men out and go to war.
DOWNSIDE:
NONE.
1ST 4 INGREDIENTS:
Enriched Wheat Flour
Sugar
Highfructose Corn Syrup
Vegetable Shortening (out of respect for the animals!)
LAST 4 INGREDIENTS:
Whey
Salt
Baking Soda
Artifical Flavor (to avoid "gaminess")
PACKAGING:
Classic! The same as you remember. It still has the white string for easy carrying whether you're 2 or 200!
DO I RECOMMEND YOU TRY THIS YOURSELF? (YES/NO - EXPLAIN):
Yes. This may not be the cure for depression, but you're guaranteed a smile a bite as you revisit your youth.
WHICH SOUTH PARK CHARACTER WOULD LIKE IT BEST?:
I would say Gay Al, because he loves animals so much... but he might get offended because you're eating them. I think the aliens would because they could take them home with them, say they've seen Noah's Arch and avoid stepping in giant piles of dung.
HOW CAN THE PRODUCT BE IMPROVED:
Not really an improvement, but maybe line extension of covering just one half in a slab of chocolate, the back half, so you could still enjoy the detail of each animal.
