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Mr. Goodbar Bites

OFFICIAL SNACK REPORT
Sanctioned By WASAW Snack Committee

Reviewed By: Paddy O'Poppycock

Location: Target

OFFICIAL NAME OF SNACK:
Mr. Goodbar Bites

WEIGHT: 12 oz

DESCRIPTION OF SNACK:
Chocolate-covered peanuts. Salty peanuts. Which makes you pause and realize that a Mr. Goodbar is just a bunch of chocolate-covered salty peanuts all smooshed together. Huh. I wonder how they smoosh it? I'll bet a scientist knows.

SSI RATING (SNACK SATISFACTION INDEX - 1-10):  7

UPSIDE:  First off, the name rocks. While Hershey's has an entire line of products under the "Bites" umbrella (KitKat Bites, Hershey's with Almond Bites, etc.), only Mr. Goodbar Bites is a full sentence and sounds like you're making fun of someone. Your seventh grade shop teacher, perhaps. Or your high school guidance counselor who told your class valedictorian to apply to the local community college as a back-up in case "the state college thing doesn't work out." Mr. Goodbar Bites, alright.

Great Hershey's chocolate and nice quality peanuts make this a step above most mass-produced chocolate-covered peanut snack treat. As WASAW fan Lisa pointed out when suggesting this treat  to us, It's a great snack to enjoy during the movies. Think about it, why get popcorn and a candy bar? You get both the sweet and the salty in a bag of Mr. Goodbar Bites.

And for those of you watching your weight, given the above-average saltiness of the peanuts, I was able to consume this bag in stages over the course of a couple of days - rather than all in one sitting.
 

DOWNSIDE: I want to eat a bag of chocolate-covered peanuts all in one sitting. Hell, the movie I bought them for was two hours long. I stopped eating these after the previews...

Also, why the whole "reclosable" bag thing - using a sticky tab you peel off the back to seal the folded bag shut for freshness. I tried using it, but the stickiness of the tab wasn't holding up to the pressure. This movie lets out and as folks are clammering for the exit, I'm wrestling with a freakin' bag of Mr. Goodbar Bites. I looked like a third grader trying to seal a jar of pickles using oven mitts dipped in petroleum jelly.



 


First 4 Ingredients

Milk Chocolate
Peanuts
Sugar
Cornstarch

 


'Reclosable' tab. In theory.

PACKAGING:

Big fan. Yellow is eye-catching and the little bites popping out of the center of the bag look like they're actually excited about the prospect of being consumed. Watch out - they're flying toward your mouth! The back of the bag conveniently communicates to the consumer what other fine flavors of Bites are currently available.

But points are taken away for that 'reclosable' tab. For gosh sakes, just make the bag a Ziploc and we can all go back to wasting our time on things other than closing a bag of chocolate-covered peanuts. Like watching "Father of the Pride" or rooting for the Celtics.
 

DO YOU RECOMMEND THIS SNACK? (YES/NO - EXPLAIN):

Sure. But if you're not a salty snack fan, don't be fooled by the chocolate focus of this snack. The salt doesn't just compete for attention on your tongue, it wrestles your tongue to the ground and rubs its ass on it.
 

MR. GOODBAR BITES - THAT'S A RELATIVELY NEW PRESENTATION OF THE CLASSIC CANDY BAR, ISN'T IT?  HOW OLD IS THE ORIGINAL MR. GOODBAR?

According to this site, Hershey's Mr. Goodbar has been around since 1925.

However, when Mr. Goodbar turned 18 in 1943, it started hanging out with the wrong candy crowd and for a while was known as "Mr. Vagabondbar." After being grounded for its wayward behavior, the candy was briefly known by some as "Mr. CrabbyAssbar." Yep, it's all true. Feel free to pass that along to your friends.


YOU JUST MAKE CRAP UP, DON'T YOU?

Mr. Goodbar Bites are made out of kelp and recycled tires.


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